Monday, December 10, 2012

Christmas Thoughts...(And A Rap Song)

There's something about having a Christmas tree in your living room that makes you feel like royalty. Maybe it's the bling...the brilliance...the giant evergreen sparkling with jewels... Actually, it's almost like having a house guest that lights up the room. It makes you smile, reflect, and settle into a comfy chair and feel grateful.
On the other hand, however, the cookies piled on a plate in the kitchen can make you feel like a rolly-polly ,sugar-logged, out-of-control, crazy woman whose best intentions of a diet have been thrown out the window like a dead fly.
Why is it that cookies have no boundaries? They are allowed to haunt your daytime activities, interrupt your dreams, appear on plates at every store, party, place and planet that you visit during the holidays.
Cookies are nothing but trouble. They don't appear in singles- they form gangs! And they are experts on taunting and teasing and manipulation. Face it-(like I finally did)...the only way to silence them is to give them a belly.
I love this time of year because it's really the only politically and socially correct time to listen to Christmas music. There's something almost mystical about playing a Christmas CD as you stare at the tree, wrap presents- or bake cookies! (Darn! There they are again!)
The old classics are my favorite, although Michael Buble and The Backstreet Boys have worn a place inside my "I- can't -get this- song- out -of -my- head" list. Truthfully, I don't really know half the words...I hum a lot.
Plus, it's hard to sing with a mouth full of cookies.... :(
When I was a child we got ONE present at Christmas. One. So you better bet we loved that gift more than anything. Nowadays kids have lists. Long, detailed, Amazonian lists that require parents to get a seasonal job stuffing fruit baskets.
I'm still very happy with a single gift. My needs are simple. Candles, perfume, pajamas, slippers...
or cookie cutters. (Crap! What did I tell you?)
So far we haven't seen any snow, but it turned off really cold today. There has to be snow at Christmas to put you in the mood. It's like setting the stage for a play. Without snow, the entire show lacks a special kind of spirit.
Nothing is sweeter that having your tree lit at night and watching snow falling outside the window,
listening to Christmas carols, placing elegantly wrapped presents beneath the tree...
...and dreading that gang of cookies that are waiting for you in the other room.

 Cookie Rap
We are chocolate, we are lemon,
 We are ir-re-sistible to women.
 We defy your diet,
 start a riot-
 you just can't fight it!
 Ahh- We're dangerous..
 We are oat, we are glazed-
 We will put you in a haze-
 Strike you a blow
 before you say "no"-
 Got no 'otha place to go-
We're dangerous...
Yeah, we're dangerous-
Gonna seek you out-
gonna make you pout-
You is gonna shout-
"Get in my belly!"


  1. Wonderful Rap song...I think I have heard it every time I put a cookie in my mouth!! I thought I would miss the snow when we moved here by the sea but for some strange reason it has actually snowed here each winter since we moved here. Of course the neighborhood says it is our fault because we brought it over from Montana. I thought for sure I was leaving it behind forever. But this snow doesn't stay long in our rainy climate. Just long enough for me to sit on the window seat and watch it snow and dream of childhood Christmas' of the past. Always makes me smile.
    Oh, gotta go...the timer just went off saying my cookies are ready to come out of the oven!!! ;)

  2. You’re a goof, I want to hear you sing that song next time I see you!-DIL